Nipped from uurabbit — you know me, I can't turn down a good survey.

Firsts

First best friend: Jessica and Stephanie who lived on my street. I don't know if one preceeded the other. Or, oh, I think the two Michaels, one of whom I was engaged to, came first, actually. That's pre-kindergarten.

First car: My 'Tangbaby! Still my only car. I hope he lasts a good while longer.

First date: Technically, seeing The Bachelor with Dan junior year of high school. I still maintain I was tricked into it, so Olivers with Shawn freshman year of college.

First real kiss: Shawn.

First job: $250 a month to write episode summaries for The West Wing. I want that job back.

First screen name: gusgus82, I think.

First self purchased album: The first one I can remember is Chantal Kreviazuk's Under These Rocks and Stones, but that probably wasn't the very first.

First funeral: My grandfather at 13. I didn't go to my great-grandmother's when I was younger, for some reason.

First pets: A lhasa apso named Spanky.

First piercing/tattoo: Lobes at my dad's suggestion when I was ten or twelve (but definitely not, evidently, eleven).

First credit card: The day I turned 18, you know it.

First enemy: Former best friend mentioned above, Stephanie. I don't remember why, though.

First big trip: North Carolina to visit my grandparents sometime in elementary school.

First musician you remember hearing in your house: Bad Company, maybe.

Lasts.

Last big car ride: I'm not sure what big means here, if important, then my dad driving me to the airport; if including a massive amount of people.. I have no idea.

Last good cry: I have not really allowed myself to cry here. The last time I almost cried, or leaked a little, was a week or so ago; last genuine cry the first time I watched Harry Potter 3 (yes I know I'm lame).

Last library book checked out: I still have Virginia Woolf & Edith Wharton's letters out from forever ago.

Last movie seen: The Cooler. Good but not what I expected.

Last beverage drank: Water.

Last food consumed: Chips and guacamole dip.

Last crush: Gary Oldman, lololol. Real crush? I question the authenticity of every crush I ever thought I had, which even so would number about two, but I guess probably Shawn. I've not been interested since.

Last phone call: Probably the last time my mother called me. There's always this weird 2-second time delay which makes communication obnoxious.

Last time showered: um... Friday night, to be honest. I've become very gross. Much grosser than usual, which is saying something.

Last shoes worn: Currently wearing Avia tennis shoes. I hate wearing shoes.

Last cd played: Right before I came to the lab I was listening to my mp3 CD comprising Dar Williams, David Mead, Dave Matthews, David Gray, Dashboard Confessional, Del Amitri, and everyone else that fits in there somewhere alphabetically.

Last annoyance: Hum. Oh yes, while listening to above cd, inconsiderate Dutch girl decided to blast her insipid dance music, as per usual.

Last disappointment: Last big one, not being able to move my flight date up to last Thursday.

Last time wanting to die: I have never wanted to die.

Last time scolded: I don't know, quite a while ago.

Last shirt worn: Currently wearing a white sweater and grey hoodie.

Last thing said to you online: Lani's comment on the last entry about queer theory.

Last thing you said online: I'm in the middle of writing a response on AVEN about whether asexuality is hard-wired or chosen.

Five details about your appearance right now.
[x] tennis shoes
[x] jeans
[x] hair in a ridiculous style I wear here when no one's going to see me and I haven't showered, wherein my very very short short hair is pulled back into a little mushroom ponytail and I wear a headband to keep all the hair that falls out back.
[x] no makeup
[x] it's pretty obvious I don't shower regularly. haha

Five things you did today.
[x] snoozed an hour after my alarm.
[x] finished reading my Judith Butler article.
[x] played some Snake.
[x] ate strawberry yogurt and chips & guacamole.
[x] changed my clothes. that's a big deal.

Five things that everyone should know about you.
[x] hands off, I'm asexual. haha
[x] I enjoy solitude, I'm comfortable with silence; don't feel the need to entertain me.
[x] I believe I can do just about anything I set out to do, but I am absolutely the least ambitious person I've ever met.
[x] I am easily obsessed. Not with 'real' people, but projects, celebrities, &c.
[x] I suppose I come off as an elitist snob, but I'm really, really not.

Five groups/artists you listened to yesterday.
[x] Same as above... Dar Williams
[x] Dashboard Confessional
[x] Dave Matthews Band
[x] Del Amitri
[x] David Mead

Five things that make you happy.
[x] Gary Oldman. (I'm sorry, this is beyond sad, but just his name makes me goofy.)
[x] Emails from friends and family.
[x] Seeing strangers do cute things.
[x] Mutual understanding.
[x] Music.

Five things that disgust you.
[x] People who remain ignorant by choice.
[x] I'm sorry, LEARN THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOUR AND YOU'RE! No excuse.
[x] My own laziness.
[x] Meat.
[x] People who think belching and farting is funny. Also movies based around such humor.

Five things you can't live without.
[x] Family, friends, very rapidly including the AVEN community.
[x] solitude.
[x] Books.
[x] Music.
[x] Internet.

Five things you'll do when you complete this.
[x] keep doing nothing on the internet all day.
[x] possibly gather a bit of background info on Butler.
[x] Clean up my room a little.
[x] Start to pack what can go and separate out the things I need to give to the Dutch equivalent of Goodwill.
[x] Do the laundry I'll need for the next 10 days.

Five things you feel right now.
[x] Inexplicably tired.
[x] Relaxed.
[x] Unconcerned.
[x] Expectant.
[x] Understood.

do you like candles?: indifferent. They're nice, but I'm too lazy to light them, and I get so many I'd never go out of my way to buy any.

do you like hot wax?: is this different from candle substance?

do you like incense?: it's ok, but I'd never buy it for myself.

do you believe in love?: YES! Love actually is all around.

do you believe in soul mates: NO. Scoff.

do you believe in love at first sight?: no. Love is necessarily based on mutual understanding. Though I feel a sort of love for strangers I see picking up trash, things like that.

do you believe in heaven?: no

do you believe in forgiveness?: Yes, though I suppose not everyone inclines toward it.

do you believe in God?: ...no is the short story.

who is your worst enemy?: I don't bother having 'enemies.'

if you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be?: I want a tiny white cat named tofu. A monkey or a marmot, also.

what are five cities you wouldn't mind relocating to: London, Columbus, somewhere in Oregon, Rhode Island or similar.

what are some of your favorite pig out foods?: um, hmm, not that I don't ever pig out, but I can't really think of anything in particular.

what's something that you wish people would understand?: love is love. Get over all the rest of it.

what's something you wish you could understand better?: making better-looking webpages.

who's someone you miss that you haven't seen in a long time?: Mrs. Ed, I think.

YOUR FIRST KISS (haha)
a. How old were you?: 19
b. Where did it happen?: bah, in my bed, 'cause we were sleeping together 2 weeks before we ever kissed.
c. When did it happen?: the last day of exams freshman year of college
d. Who initiated the kiss?: him, although the night before I tried to kiss him, and it was so freaking weird I just gave up.
e. Was there a second kiss with that same person later?: yes.

YOUR FRIENDS LIST
a. Ever dated anyone who was your best friend before?: Yes, Shawn was at the time one of my collective best friends. That was a bad idea.
b. Would you consider dating your best friends ex?: no, off-limits, never never no.
c. Have you kissed your best friends ex?: somehow that seems worse than dating them.

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME:
[x] being raped.
[x] Alzheimer's disease or similar.
[x] My parents dying.

THREE PEOPLE I TALK TO MOST:
[x] mom
[x] dad
[x] Lani

THREE THINGS I LOVE:
[x] Surveys that aren't redundant.
[x] Intelligent conversation with best friends.
[x] Silly conversation with best friends.

THREE THINGS I HATE:
[x] being asked the same question twice.
[x] mushrooms.
[x] when people write mean things about celebrities or say they're ugly, because when they search for their name they're going to get their feelings hurt. I know I've done this before but I vowed not to when I read David Thewlis was unnerved by some fans' negative reactions to his being cast as Lupin. I know I'm weird, but that makes me sad, so I'm never going on record saying anything negative about any decent people ever again.

THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND:
[x] hatred
[x] most people
[x] why I like surveys like this so much.

THREE THINGS ON MY DESK:
[x] um, two computers.
[x] this other girl, or at least her arms.
[x] a piece of scrap paper mostly in Dutch.

THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW:
[x] well, this
[x] checking into AVEN
[x] crap! email a father's day card 'cause I suck.

THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:
[x] be fluent in at least one other language
[x] umm... I don't know, I just want to do whatever I want to do day by day.

THREE THINGS I CAN DO:
[x] make moderately adequate webpages.
[x] identify several members of order odonata down to genus and species.
[x] waste time effectively.

THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
[x] dance the pony.
[x] talk on the phone comfortably.
[x] work up the motivation to do anything these days.

THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY:
[x] neurotic
[x] quixotic
[x] robotic

THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY LOOKS:
[x] skeletal.. haha, that's not funny.
[x] unadorned
[x] nice-looking

THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST:
[x] really
[x] actually
[x] I

IN THE LAST 24 HRS
* Cried: no
* Worn a skirt: no
* Met someone new: no
* Cleaned your room: no. will in the next 24 hours, promise.
* Done laundry: no, but same as above.
* Driven a car: no; miss it.

FRIENDS AND LIFE
* Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend: nope
* Like anyone?: I like almost everyone
* Who have you known the longest of your friends: hum, Benjamin.

I got tired of answering questions.